Spring Break
Types limit 'pool of prospects'
WHITNEY KESSLER
Issue date: 2/14/07 Section: Variety
- Page 1 of 1
What's your type: tall, dark and handsome? Blonde or brunette?
Attraction is both a biologically and an environmentally influenced facet of a human being's life. Many define their pool of prospects by claiming a particular "type" of person they would want to be with. How are these definitions developed and why?
Family Matters
Jerry Gale, the director of the Marriage and Family Therapy Program and assistant professor at the University, said modeling of relationships starts with the parents and family of a child.
Conflict management, intimacy and other aspects of a relationship are learned from those examples, he said.
"Being attracted to people is the nature of a human being," Gale said. "A lot of it is who we are and our own experiences from life. Parents define roles for children - they learn this is what a wife is or a mom is."
People tend to be more alike than different, he said. This likeness causes the tendency in people to befriend and date people who are more like them.
"A lot of people do try and base what they're looking for on a healthy relationship within their family," said Kevin O'Brien, a sophomore psychology major.
He said he thinks people are drawn to what they know because it is easier to communicate with someone with like characteristics.
A bad influence in our society is the media, he said.
"Media tries to reinforce the importance of physical attraction while downplaying everything else that is necessary to a relationship," O'Brien said. "Types are really something most people just play into more than believe because of superficial reasons."
Gale said "types" can limit the options a person has and experience the person can gain.
There are several more factors that go into being with a person than attraction, he said.
"I find it very problematic," he said. "The whole dating process is a time of figuring out. It is good to know what you are attracted to, but you have to learn from experience what is actually workable."
The More, the Merrier
Michelle Kneubuhler, a junior psychology major, said she thinks one's type has to do with memory and routine.
"If you have a good experience with a dark, handsome guy, then you will associate most of those types with that good feeling," she said. "We are all creatures of routine - it is that simple on the conscious level but definitely on a subconscious level."
She said she is attracted to guys that are like her because it is easier to work things out if two people think the same way.
"My motto is 'the more, the merrier' as far as dating goes because then you can find exactly what you want," Kneubuhler said.
She said in psychology classes such as Human Sexuality, they have learned beauty is often equated with youth. At the college age, we are technically at the apex of our hormonal sex drive.
Therefore, there is pressure to be in a relationship or to date.
"Put a lot of young, beautiful people together and a lot of hormones - there is going to be a lot of 'doing it,'" she said.
The Biology of Affection
Taryne Mingo, a senior psychology major, said relationships require checks and balances to last. She said the types should be a guideline for dating and not a rigid definition.
"It goes back to evolution when we were trying to survive. On a subconscious level, our minds lead us to those characteristics," Mingo said. "Biology is the set path we are given by genes and environment ... [it] is kind of the wind that will knock you wherever it wants."
Women especially have trouble with this, she said. Mingo, who is also majoring in women's studies, said she feels women have to figure out where family and marriage fit into their lives if they are ambitious or want to work outside of the home.
"When you first meet someone, you meet their representative, but it isn't the real person," she said. "The chances of you finding someone on a timeline is not practical because you have to spend time with someone to know them."
If you choose to have a "type," Mingo said she thinks it is best to use it as a means of narrowing options rather than cutting people off right away.
Value Sex in Dating
Michelle Cohen, the sexual health coordinator at the University Health Center, said the type of relationship and personal values should be major influences on deciding who one should date.
"I encourage students to think about what is important to them when choosing their partner," she said. "People have different beliefs, values, wants and needs. These factors influence the type of partner someone chooses."
Attraction is both a biologically and an environmentally influenced facet of a human being's life. Many define their pool of prospects by claiming a particular "type" of person they would want to be with. How are these definitions developed and why?
Family Matters
Jerry Gale, the director of the Marriage and Family Therapy Program and assistant professor at the University, said modeling of relationships starts with the parents and family of a child.
Conflict management, intimacy and other aspects of a relationship are learned from those examples, he said.
"Being attracted to people is the nature of a human being," Gale said. "A lot of it is who we are and our own experiences from life. Parents define roles for children - they learn this is what a wife is or a mom is."
People tend to be more alike than different, he said. This likeness causes the tendency in people to befriend and date people who are more like them.
"A lot of people do try and base what they're looking for on a healthy relationship within their family," said Kevin O'Brien, a sophomore psychology major.
He said he thinks people are drawn to what they know because it is easier to communicate with someone with like characteristics.
A bad influence in our society is the media, he said.
"Media tries to reinforce the importance of physical attraction while downplaying everything else that is necessary to a relationship," O'Brien said. "Types are really something most people just play into more than believe because of superficial reasons."
Gale said "types" can limit the options a person has and experience the person can gain.
There are several more factors that go into being with a person than attraction, he said.
"I find it very problematic," he said. "The whole dating process is a time of figuring out. It is good to know what you are attracted to, but you have to learn from experience what is actually workable."
The More, the Merrier
Michelle Kneubuhler, a junior psychology major, said she thinks one's type has to do with memory and routine.
"If you have a good experience with a dark, handsome guy, then you will associate most of those types with that good feeling," she said. "We are all creatures of routine - it is that simple on the conscious level but definitely on a subconscious level."
She said she is attracted to guys that are like her because it is easier to work things out if two people think the same way.
"My motto is 'the more, the merrier' as far as dating goes because then you can find exactly what you want," Kneubuhler said.
She said in psychology classes such as Human Sexuality, they have learned beauty is often equated with youth. At the college age, we are technically at the apex of our hormonal sex drive.
Therefore, there is pressure to be in a relationship or to date.
"Put a lot of young, beautiful people together and a lot of hormones - there is going to be a lot of 'doing it,'" she said.
The Biology of Affection
Taryne Mingo, a senior psychology major, said relationships require checks and balances to last. She said the types should be a guideline for dating and not a rigid definition.
"It goes back to evolution when we were trying to survive. On a subconscious level, our minds lead us to those characteristics," Mingo said. "Biology is the set path we are given by genes and environment ... [it] is kind of the wind that will knock you wherever it wants."
Women especially have trouble with this, she said. Mingo, who is also majoring in women's studies, said she feels women have to figure out where family and marriage fit into their lives if they are ambitious or want to work outside of the home.
"When you first meet someone, you meet their representative, but it isn't the real person," she said. "The chances of you finding someone on a timeline is not practical because you have to spend time with someone to know them."
If you choose to have a "type," Mingo said she thinks it is best to use it as a means of narrowing options rather than cutting people off right away.
Value Sex in Dating
Michelle Cohen, the sexual health coordinator at the University Health Center, said the type of relationship and personal values should be major influences on deciding who one should date.
"I encourage students to think about what is important to them when choosing their partner," she said. "People have different beliefs, values, wants and needs. These factors influence the type of partner someone chooses."
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