The Red and Black

Issue date: 2/26/09 Section: Opinions

MARC MCAFEE

This just in - my sources tell me Afroman's 2001 marijuana anthem, "Because I Got High" is not - I repeat, not - an anti-drug song. True, his song lyrics blame weed for the loss of his wife, kids, job, and the use of his arms and legs.

But he's actually putting forth a positive and carefree message about the drug's use: everybody loves the tumbleweed.

So why not legalize it?

It's no longer just a question for Afroman's fans. Personally, I don't care about laws against puffing the magic dragon. The shiva's just not my thing. Even if it was, I wouldn't have the brass to print it in the paper, as Waites Laseter did last week. After that column, some thought he had brains the size of a dime bag, but I disagree.

Even in the age of Facebook-snooping employers, the man has faith in his cause. He told me he believes his habit will soon be a non-issue.

I doubt it.

When I spoke to Laseter last week, he was wearing a hemp necklace and a Bob Marley hairnet to control his mane. Although he had an intelligent message, I and others listening couldn't help cracking a smile or two. Why?

Because nobody wearing a bandana has been taken seriously since Jimi Hendrix died.

Because despite the fact that respectable figures such as Barack Obama and Michael Phelps are both one-time admirers of Mary Jane, they are not the ones advocating for the legalization of what seems to be a common and relatively harmless illegal drug.

Instead, we have the University's chapter of National Organization for the Reformation of Marijuana Law member who suggested meeting for a 3 p.m. interview last year at Dunkin' Donuts. This guy showed up blazed out of his mind, about to down a few doughnuts before heading off to a screening of the latest Harold and Kumar movie.

And even though that image fits into my column better than the herb at a 311 concert, I didn't make any of it up. Not a bit. That's how he wanted to spread his message to the media. It's too bad, because I think they have research and sense on their side. They certainly slapped University officials in the face.

When University Legal Affairs said the group's T-shirt was using the University logo to promote illegal activity, the group held up shot glasses from the bookstore with "Freshman" and "Sophomore" printed on the side. Isn't that the University's logo being used to promote underage drinking?

I talked to Vice President of Public Affairs Tom Jackson, and he agreed it was. (There are still two shelves of the shot glasses in the bookstore - get 'em while you can.)

The problem is that instead of the suit and tie many would expect from a group trying to reform a set of laws, we have Harold and Kumar go to the Arch.

We have a spokesman holding a "news conference" looking like he just rolled out of bed and can't wait to roll into a pile of his finest ganja.

Sorry guys, but the laughs you got from people walking by are what you can expect to get from people in the Capitol. Your audience will remain a small group of fellow tokers.

So go ahead and hit me with the "conformist" label. Tell me how I would have everyone on campus dressing like Frat-tastic Freddy and Sally the So-ho. It's not true - I love color in my life.

But you know who doesn't? Congress. And the second they see Weed lovin' Willy in the Capitol with sporting red, green and yellow, they're going to smile and walk away. It won't matter how many purple haze-loving hippie signatures you have on your petition.

So try a shave and a shower, maybe a blazed visit to the barber, and then pitch your message. Maybe you'll get somewhere. Even if you don't, you'll always have Afroman.

-Marc McAfee is a senior from Kennesaw majoring in broadcast news.

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