The Red and Black

Issue date: 3/5/09 Section: Opinions

MARC MCAFEE

Wow, there was a lot of complaining Tuesday when we had to go to class. It seems everybody was really angry about the University being unprepared to handle the winter storm.

I didn't understand why everybody was so mad. From the looks of Tuesday's fashions, we've been preparing for this storm for a long time.

"Be Prepared": It's not just the Boy Scout motto anymore.

I noticed there is a "be prepared" fashion craze going on. People seem to be dressing head to toe in clothing and accessories that are a little unnecessary. I used to think it was ridiculous, but now I realize it made a difference when it counted. Croakies, Nalgene bottles, Ugg boots - people were always preparing for the worst winter storm in 70 years.

Every little fashion accessory had its own purpose.

Take Nalgene bottles. People have been carrying them around campus for a long time, ready to measure out the precise amount of water needed for campfire cooking at a moment's notice. Maybe a few of you used them this weekend, when you were camping out in your frozen living rooms.

Then on Tuesday, the fact that the bottles are shatterproof was no longer just for style. It helped when people were busting their rears - and their water bottles - on the ice.

Don't forget Croakies. For years, males all over campus have been walking around with a deathly fear their sunglasses might fall off their faces, so they took to strapping them around their neck. This previously goofy looking trend came in handy when the same guys were slipping down icy stairs.

Their wrists may have broken, but their Ray-Bans? All good.

Girls have been preparing for frost-bitten toes for awhile, too. They had taken to wearing Eskimo boots on 75 degree days. Well, those ugly Uggs sure came in handy over the weekend when Eskimo weather actually hit us, didn't they?

And those ready-for-Everest North Face and Mountain Hardware jackets? (With the logo that keeps you so much warmer.) Hey - they may look ridiculous when it's 60 degrees outside, but this weekend they were there for you, too. It's funny how things fall into place. But we can't let it stop here.

The "be prepared" fashion world must continue to produce. There's going to be flash flood warnings as this ice melts.

Will I see anyone wearing swim goggles in case the water gets too high? You can get tinted ones, so you still look cool on those cloudy days usually reserved for Aviator sunglasses.

Or maybe, in case of a really bad flood, a colored snorkel strapped to matching Croakies could come into style. And those already in-style boat shoes will be great if we have to board Noah's Second Ark.

The Boy Scout fashion trend can't stop when summer arrives. Could flame-retardant clothing come into style? Why not?

You would have pants that won't burn off your body if you're caught in one of those raging infernos that are always on the news.

Maybe that's a little too much. Maybe we should just stick to wearing our expensive Chaco sandals, which will help when downtown Athens gets hit by that flash flood. We'll all be ready when we have to step on slippery rocks to guide our raft to safety on East Broad Street.

Or maybe I should just stop trying to write a column when my mind is on Spring Break. What do you think?

- Marc McAfee is a senior from Kennesaw majoring in broadcast news.

Page 1 of 1

Article Tools